Social Media Sanity

Our lives have been consumed into social media. Consumed. Mangled. Managed badly it can only lead to a lot of negativity. The glamorous shots of the school yard bully marrying her university sweetheart. That guy you met in a pub getting yet another promotion and a company car.

Then there’s you.

Sitting in your PJs. On a Saturday afternoon. Reaching for an alcoholic relief to the situation.

Social Steralisation

Read between the posts

Facebook and Instagram are riddled with people wanting to present their most ideal self. As the phrase goes;

It’s not your successful friends posting vague inspirational quotes

The same goes for those couples that continuously post all those lovey dovey messages back and forth. It’s been found that people that continually post about their relationship are more likely to have low self-esteem and less likely to be happy about the relationship, read up at The Atlantic.

Of course, there are the people who are more obvious about their desperation, the Vaguebookers. You know the sort. Short pathetic ‘Woe is me’ posts. Designed to gather as many ‘u ok hun?’s as possible. I’ve seen those that don’t get enough reactions get deleted and reposted in the hopes of more attention. That is what it is. People driving for social attention.

In all of these cases, it’s a simply people clamouring for social acknowledgement. That need to see comments and reactions totalling up.

social sterilisation cmnt 1

How can I maintain my sanity?

There are a few ways really, some you may not be looking forward to hearing- and others you may already be practising.

Think sceptically- don’t be afraid to question it

My mother always said “if something is too good to be true- then it probably is”, and I’ve extended this to social media. If something doesn’t quite add up, be it a piece of news or controversial meme, don’t take it at face value. Check it.

One that does the round is this lovely image;

animalrights

What people fail to see is that the image originally came from;

animalrights00

You can read more about this on Hoaxes.org as part of ‘Operation Cat Nip’; an animal hoarder had hundreds of animals seized, they were undergoing a mass neutering so as to get the animals rehomed as quickly as possible. Instead of the image putting forward the message of nurturing and caring for one’s animals; it was high jacked for a completely for likes and retweets rather than anything substantial for animal rights.

No Use? Cut it loose

I unfriend people, a lot.

Often that gets looks of horror and confusion.

I don’t see why I should have negative, uninteresting, or pointless, posts clogging up my feed when I am solely responsible for its curation. There are a few people that I bend the rules for, but in general, I’m pretty strict.

Constant vaguebookers go quickly.

Posting hourly/daily pictures of babies are out. I’m your friend, not your baby’s.

Oversharers of every detail of their life? Out of the window.

Instead, connect to positive groups. The ‘Catto’ and ‘Doggo’ groups are so positive, and filled with beautiful and loved pets. Inject some positivity!

social sterilisation cmnt 2

Stop the stalking or semi stalking

Up until recently I still had a “friend” on Facebook, I spoke about her briefly on 5 Reasons Why I’m… Childfree. I loved to watch her choke on reality, flail in the real world she was so ill prepared for.

To cackle to myself as she whined about the pettiest of things. The time she thought that doing admin for a Brownie pack was hard- I was in tears. “Wait till she get’s a real job!” I giggled to myself. She’s the exemplar of mollycoddled, with rich overly attentive parents ready to swoop in at her smallest of whims. And there were many.

The kind of woman who wanted to go to university to find her husband, not her future career.

The kind of person who would claim to be self-made, whilst never having to have paid for anything herself.

I could go on. Which is why I shouldn’t.

One day I realised that yes, she had ruined a substantial part of my life. Instead of moving on, and surrounding myself with positivity, I was putting my energy negatively towards her.

In short, she did not deserve my attention. Not anymore. So I unfriended her, removed her from any social network that we had vaguely connected on, and continued on with my life.

I’m unlucky enough to have a few people in my past who, although I don’t want to know anymore. An example of which sent me a friend request the very evening I finished this blog post. I umm’d and err’d for half an hour debating whether to add her back (yes I removed her some time ago). But why would I want her back in my life? I have literally (in the actual meaning of the word) lived a better life without her in it. So I deleted the request and added this edit. The only thing I’m unsure of is if this counts as an edit.

Take a break

As someone who uses social media to promote her work- this is a hard thing to write about. It’s something that is built into my day. Once Belov’d is up, he takes a run, but I’m checking Twitter and perusing through Facebook.

There are days I’m trying to make an effort to not look in on an hourly… minute by minute… basis. Even to the point of putting devices on plane mode. When Belov’d and I had no internet I got so much done- and there are days when I am so tempted to turn it off at the router. I don’t have the guts to do that though.

Get in touch with your thoughts, suggestions and more! Please, comment below, connect with me on Facebook (/pixieteeth), find me on Insta or Tweet as @frandobagel, or email me at hellopixieteeth@gmail.com

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15 thoughts on “Social Media Sanity

  1. Great article, although I am also a bit over the cat and dog posts too. I do believe if you are my friend I will see some not so perfect things on your feed. Having said that I’m old enough that none of my friends use IG, Twitter so that is all just work, thank god!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I giggled almost the whole way through. Its all just so true, what you wrote about the facade social media allows people to hide behind. We all have the ‘woe is me’, ‘look at me’ friend on social media… until we delete them and move on up in our day and life. Also, i had no idea there was a term ‘vaguebookers’ lol. Well done on deleting anything social media stupid that brings you down 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  3. This is hilarious. I have a friend just like her and you’re right. Wasting too much energy.

    I loved your line – “I am solely responsible for curating the content” – so true!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. A great article – so true. I am quicker in unfriending today, whether in real life or online. I was always the one hanging on too long so it is still a big step to do so though. But sometimes it has too be.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I had a bad case of social media insanity last year. I worked as a newspaper reporter and was constantly being bombarded from readers about little details in stories, pitches for new stories. I felt like even though I lived alone in my one bedroom apartment, I couldn’t escape my work because of social media. (Mind you, these people were communicating me with my personal accounts, not the work accounts, though those were heavily used as well). This is ultimately one of the reasons why I quit my job. These are great tips!

    Liked by 1 person

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